Over the last few years a slew of "urban legends for wedding planning" have sprung up. Many brides get caught up in these myths as they seem simple enough and, on the surface, sometimes even logical. Don't be fooled. Dispelling the unfortunately too common fallacies of wedding planning will help you avoid disappointment and disaster.

MYTH: I will not go over budget.
TRUTH: Fact is, you probably will. Almost all brides "forget" to include some necessary expenses and/or incur additional costs at the last minute. Some brides also "fall in love" with certain items and must have them whether or not they were originally budgeted for. Create and work with a detailed budget based on your needs. Start by shopping a reputable Bride Expo and/or call Professional Planners and service providers to get relative wedding costs. As a precaution, take 10% off of your budget total and hold it back for those unexpected expenses-if you need it, it will not push you over the edge, and if you don't you will have some extra cash for the honeymoon (or bank account!).

MYTH: I have to invite everyone whose wedding I have attended, including distant family members.
TRUTH: In some cultures and families this may be the case but for modern couples there are a new set of "rules." Throughout your adult life you may be invited to any number of weddings for any number of reasons. Many of these people you grow apart from for various reasons and simply lose touch. A wedding should be about the people who are most important in your lives, celebrating with you. If you do not keep in contact with others whose weddings you have attended, you do not need to include them in your guest list. As for family, many different factors come into play. Depending on the type of family and even your culture, you may be expected to invite everyone. On the other hand, you may only want to invite relatives that you keep in contact with. You should include family members with whom you share holidays or see on a regular basis. You can even try to make a cut-off point like at 1st or 2nd cousins. Of course, as with many wedding decisions, there may be some unhappy relatives.
MYTH: Buffet meals are less expensive than plated meals.
TRUTH: Buffet meals require just as much time and attention as plated meals, and in addition the caterer must make more food as some of the guests may visit the buffet line one, two, or three times before being satisfied. Secondly, there must also be enough china and flatware on hand for these repeat visitors-a guest should never revisit the line with a "dirty" plate. Don't make the mistake of thinking food stations are the same as a buffet either. Stations are typically more costly and elaborate than buffets.

MYTH: You can cut floral costs by purchasing your own candles and/or containers for floral arrangements, instead of having the florist provide them.
TRUTH: In actuality, these are items that the florist makes little, if any money on. What you end up with instead is a string of problems ranging from containers that cannot stand up to the complexities of the floral arrangements you desire, mismatched containers, votive holders and hurricanes that do not meet fire codes, candles that are scented and irritate the senses, or worse yet, candles that don't last for the evening. Many brides also like to purchase their own twinkle lights, and miscalculate the number they need, forget adapters and extension cords, and worse yet, for the battery operated strands, forget the batteries.

MYTH: It will be perfect.
TRUTH: There is no perfection, chances are something will turn out differently than you imagine. If the string quartet is set up on the left side of the gazebo instead of the right, let it go. No one but you will know that you pictured it the other way. Plan the best you can, hire trustworthy vendors, and let go. The way it turns out may actually be better than you imagined.

MYTH: Tell the catering manager that your final guest count is actually ten less than it really is since they make extra food.
TRUTH: This is just a bad idea. Quite honestly caterers, and reception facilities have the practice of serving your wedding feast down to an art and typically only make a few "extra meals" (3% to 5% on average). Giving a lower guest count only messes with everything, especially when the catering manager sees that you have those ten extra people included on your floor plan, or on the night of the event when the staff is scrambling trying to find places for everyone. Do yourself and everyone involved a favor and give the right guest count-it is not worth the headache. How embarrassed would you be if ten people (who had responded on time) didn't get to eat at your wedding?

MYTH: The more guests I have, the bigger the "group" discount I will get from the caterer.
TRUTH: In the world of weddings, the "warehouse shopping" mentality (buying bigger is cheaper) does not apply. More people means more money. The cost of the per-person meal stays the same and the cost of the service, not to mention floral arrangements, linens, cakes, etc., only goes up to accommodate those extra guests.

MYTH: I am going to buy the dress in the magazine. I know it is "the perfect dress."
TRUTH: Begin your shopping in the magazines, but do not consider it to be the end of your dress shopping. The ads only touch on the numerous styles offered by designers. Use the magazines to get an idea of current gown styles, and to give the bridal consultant at the salon a starting place based on the styles you have selected. Keep an open mind when shopping, what you think may look good on you, may not. You may try on what seems like thousands of gowns during this process, but most brides agree when you find "the dress" you will know. Be patient and don't rush into anything, most salons have nonrefundable deposits.

MYTH: Registering (for wedding gifts) is easy.
TRUTH: Most couples hold off on registering and then do not allow enough time, assuming they are just shopping. Blocking off a couple of hours on a Saturday for registering will probably not do the trick. OK, the exception is if your fiancé just doesn't care what you select, or you have been planning since you were twelve. When you get to that store and start matching up china with silverware and glassware and table linens and then debating over stand mixers and food processors or the coffee maker as opposed to the espresso maker, you have the makings of a long day. Plan to spend some time on this task. Besides we have the Internet now, you can do your homework in advance by checking out web sites, and you may even be able to register for some items online.

MYTH: The cost of the gift (received from the invited guest) should be equivalent to what the per-person cost of the meal is.
TRUTH: No. No. No. An invitation to a wedding is not a trade out. A guest is not expected to know what you are spending per-person, much less be forced to spend that amount on a gift. The bride or groom does not get to dictate the price range of their wedding gifts.

MYTH: You have one year to write thank you notes.
TRUTH: A widely held belief that a bride and groom have one year to send thank you notes to their guests is beyond comprehension. Will you even remember what you received as wedding gifts in one year? The confusion comes from the notion that a guest has up to one year to send a gift. In actuality, the newlyweds should attempt to get out their thank you's within a few weeks of returning from the honeymoon (a couple of months is really the maximum). Thank yous for gifts received before the wedding should be sent promptly, this goes for engagement, shower, and wedding presents sent to the home.

MYTH: You can save thousand of dollars with heavy duty negotiating or sponsorship of your wedding.
TRUTH: Weddings are big business, and in Southern California where we have perfect weather for almost the entire year, there is very little off-season. Talented and respectable vendors may offer slight discounts for off nights, like Thursdays, last minute bookings, and weddings in "off season" months like January, but for the most part you are not going to be able to talk them into shaving thousands of dollars off of their price. Most vendors are usually willing to negotiate with their packages, exchanging one thing for another, for example an 18 x 20 framed engagement photos for some extra pages in your wedding album. And just to touch on sponsoring, there are vendors who will do it, but it is probably the tackiest idea ever thought of. Unfortunately too many people think this is a good idea after seeing stories of it on national television. Everyone buys into the idea. Even some celebrities "sell out" their weddings for perks and freebies.

MYTH: Guests prefer open seating because they can sit with whomever they want.
TRUTH: Guests want direction. If you know your guests, you will most likely be seating them in compatible groups anyway. There is nothing worse that being the couple that doesn't know anyone and having to walk around looking for an empty spot or having to break up your group or family because of a lack of table space. On that same note, a "singles table" is usually a bad idea. A wedding is not the place for the "Dating Game."

MYTH: Friends and others can do the job of real wedding professionals.
TRUTH: The name says it all; they are wedding professionals, not carnival experts, or meeting planners or portrait photographers at chain stores. Hiring real professionals takes your wedding to that next level, and their experience provides skill, competence, and sophistication. For example, a photographer who shoots products or even posed family portraits may be skilled and talented but shooting weddings is a whole different ball game. Wedding photographers know how to get the shots they want, get them quick, round up family, and keep the party flowing. Wedding professionals understand the flow of events and important timing elements on a wedding day. They are familiar with the emotions that go into the day and usually have a special knack for dealing with the bride, groom, wedding party, families, and even guests.

MYTH: Getting married at an off-site location will save money.
TRUTH: It can, but very rarely does. Off-site locations have so many additional expenses-valets, rentals, insurance, cleaning fees, security deposits, etc.—in addition to normal wedding expenses. While anything is possible, as a rule off-site weddings typically go over budget or cost more upfront that weddings held at traditional venues, and if you do end up being close to your budget, chances are you have done a lot of the work yourself and are too exhausted to enjoy yourself. Off-site venues also lend themselves to the use (and expense of) a wedding coordinator to manage all of the logistics. If this is your dream, just read all of the fine print and know what you could be getting yourself into from a planning standpoint.

MYTH: A vendor who is featured on television or in a magazine article must be respectable and be among the best of the best.
TRUTH: People end up on television and in magazines for many reasons. Many of the quotes, advice, and features you read in magazines usually incorporate the publication's advertisers into them. Most television shows are not looking for the wedding vendor, but rather they are searching for a particular look and someone who can perform on camera. Do your homework-don't let Hollywood glitz blind your judgment.
Holly Lefevre with Patty Andersen, Kelly Meyer, Lisa Vorce, and April Whitney.

If you're new to wedding planning, you may want to attend a popular BrideWord Expo. BrideWorld hosts events where you can meet with dozens upon dozens of wedding professionals face-to-face, not to mention wedding coordinators who can answer your toughest questions. If you can't wait, you can view local experts now.